Theyare effectively little girls pants, white satin nylon with loads of rufflessewn into the back. Joan holds them up in front of Peter and I can tell fromthe look in his eye that he is caught between emotions. He sooo wants to wearthese, but can't admit that in front of his wife, let alone two other people.His eyes appear to be looking around the room for a means of escape as Joancrouches down, never taking her eyes of his and says."Up."Peter lifts his left leg and Joan slides the panties up. How I wonder! Halfway to paradise already, the Lady in Green says, and I wonder when will she allow us passage over the ocean to our sweet reward? She visited us yet again yesterday, offering only the most encouraging of platitudes just as she has done upon every visit since she brought us here, yet not a word on just when she will lead the way across our ocean to the promised paradise where Suzanne and I shall once and for all be free of the horrors of our past. How sweet that day shall be –. “I’d have liked to wake you with a blow job, and made breakfast for you.”“Me too,” I smiled and kissed her tenderly.“Especially the blow job?”“Both. And the snuggling. You’ll find him.”“Find who?”“A man to love. You’re a sexy woman. And bright and interesting.”“I’m a whore,” she muttered.“More a slut, I think. You like it too much to be a whore. You may get something material out of it, but that’s just gravy. You’ll find a man, maybe a bit younger than you, because he’ll need the energy to keep. Skirts, bras, dresses, long hair, makeup, etc…where the things that made girls seem so different from boys. While I likely didn’t realize it at the time (retrospectively it seems to make sense to me), I felt the best way to understand my gender was to explore and try to understand both genders. Several times late at night or when I had the house to myself, I “borrowed” some of my mother’s bras, and a few times my sisters underwear (my mom didn’t exactly have anything underwear wise that would.
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